#58 3 Easy Ways to Form Powerful Friendships with Women Leaders Just Like You

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Welcome to the powerhouse Revolution Podcast. I’m Lucy Garnon, X corporate leader turned CEO of my dream business, helping corporate female leaders just like you to create your dream career and life. At 40 I quit the corporate world as I was tired of doing a job that no longer led me up and wanted to live my life my way. I created the power house Revolution podcast, to give you simple, actionable tips and strategies to help you create the perfect career and lifestyle that you and your family deserve. So if you’re a corporate female leader or manager who is ready to step into her superpowers and live the life you were born to live, you are definitely in the right place. Because life is way too short to dread Mondays. Okay, let’s jump into today’s episode.

Hello, they’re gorgeous. And welcome back to another episode of the powerhouse Revolution Podcast. I am in a really, really good mood today, the sun is shining as I record this, and you know what? brighter days are coming. I don’t know about you, but I am. So looking forward to see the daffodils and the one of the calls, caucuses and all those lovely spring flowers that are going to pop up in the next few weeks if they’re not up already. Actually Have you any snow jobs? Have you seen any? If you’re listening in another country, in Ireland, it’s a real sign of spring, when we start to see all the spring bulbs start to arise. Because we have had a cordon off kind of a winter so far. So I’m looking forward to springtime and longer evenings and sunshine, all those things. But for now, we are almost through this dreary phase of the winter period here in Ireland.

So I want to talk to you a little bit today about something that’s come up quite a lot, actually, with the clients I work with. And I’ve been there myself, which is all about forming friendships as a woman in leadership role, right. So I know you started your career, your leadership career with really big ambitions and an even bigger heart. But I know that sometimes you can just be back to back calls dealing with corporate politics and performance issues. And it can feel really hard. And you can sometimes feel like you’re the only woman with the seat at the table, right and constantly feel like you need to prove yourself, comparing yourself to other successes. And I often hear from some of the coins, I work with that some of them, you know, have lunch on their own, because at your level of seniority, sometimes people don’t tend to include you. And it can be kind of tough, right? You might find yourself on early morning or late night calls to accommodate the business needs. Or some of my clients work in different time zones. So they’re adapting their own needs and sometimes family to to accommodate their team in different regions. And one thing I do hear a lot is that, especially as you climb up the ladder is that sometimes it can be lonely. And sometimes, you know, you just need somebody to talk to. So I hear things like where can I have conversations like deep, meaningful conversations with women up my level, who actually get what I go through, or I hear things like I really want to be the best leader and I want to learn more about how I can be the best and how I can advance my career. I hear things like I want to have it all I want to have a great career. I want to have a fun life and I want to be happy. Can you relate? So I know you have sacrificed so much to get to your leaners layer level of seniority and I see you. But you and I both know that you didn’t step on to that leadership ladder to do it alone. You need a community of women just like you around you. Because you want to make a difference. You want more money for more security for your family. And I know that you want connection with other women. So did you know that you are the average of the five people that you spend the most time with? So it’s time for you to really pause and think about okay, looking at your career and your life goals for 2023 and look around you at the five people that you spend the most time with? Are they going to be the kind of people that are going to get you to where you want to be? And if not, it is time to uplevel your circle. So that’s why today I’m going to share firstly, why it’s so important really to form the bonds and connections and then I’m going to share three easy ways that you can make more friends just like you to support you through those bad days and celebrate with you on the good days. Sound good? Okay, so firstly, let me tell you a quick story. So you have two currencies when it comes to progressing and advancing in your career. One is your performance currency, which is how well Are you delivering results, how you perform how you interact. And then the other one is relationship. Now most people focus on the performance currency as in their results driven, they’re focused on targets, they’re supporting the business needs. And they live in a direct relationship building. But one thing I know to be true for certain, and if you’re multitasking come back to me is that all the successful people I interview and the ones I coach, and even like, I’ve studied the most successful business people in the whole entire world, none of them do it alone. And they all have a community or a network around them, of people who are like them, or in different phases of growth to them that they can learn from, and that they can inspire and teach. So when I worked in the corporate world, I am ashamed to say that I did prioritize the performance currency, I was so results driven, that I missed out on building relationships, especially outside my own area of business, I felt like I was in this corporate bubble. And I was literally brainwashed by the corporate system. And I felt all this pressure. And I really believe that my experience of the corporate world was literally the same as everyone else’s. I literally couldn’t see beyond my own job and my own industry. And I definitely missed out on the big picture, I kind of felt like, you know, I worked in the pharmaceutical industry, for the majority of my career on I never even considered what another industry could have looked like, and the fact that I had transferable skills that I didn’t realize they had, because, you know, I often wonder what may have been different for me, if I knew then what I know. Now I know for sure, I would definitely have progressed up that ladder faster. And I would have got rid of a lot of stuff I didn’t want because they would have known those other ways to do things. So really, I suppose what changed for me is that when I started coaching women in leadership a couple years ago, from all different backgrounds, so I worked with women from tech, pharma, med device, FinTech, food engineers, quality professionals, and C suite executives, like directors. And one thing I noticed is that no matter what level you’re at, in the organization, as a woman, if you’re a leader, you’re tend to be facing the same problems. And I learned so much from listening to my clients from all the different industries and their way of doing things. And I often wondered that if I had a network of women like the network, I have now and heard the struggles in different industries and how they were overcome overcoming things, that would have absolutely helped me so much, maybe I wouldn’t have felt as disconnected. And even though I definitely had a couple of great friends at work, there was still certain conversations I just didn’t feel comfortable with having. And I definitely didn’t have those women up, you know, at different phases in their career to really inspire me and motivate me. I don’t know, can you relate to that. So we tend to stay very siloed in our own industries, for sure. And as well, what’s worse is that we stay siloed into our own areas of the business. But by doing that, you’re actually missing out on so much gold, you’re missing out by networking for with women from diverse backgrounds to learn. And even the psychological weight that comes with being the decision maker as a leader can literally be lifted by just having a network of like minded women that you can bounce things off. Get advice from women who’ve experienced things that you’re currently experiencing, and get them to show you the fastest, easiest, quickest way to get there. And even just to have a space to learn and grow and vent together can seriously resulting in less stress and more success. So how do I know this because recently, I invested 15,000 In a mastermind group, because I want to accelerate my business growth and my my career success. And I now have a circle of amazing women from different industries, different backgrounds, who get what I’m going through. And honestly, it’s been a game changer for me just to be in that community. I can hear what’s working for them, I can hear what’s not working for them, I can learn from them, they can learn from me, we get to advise and support one another. And what’s amazing two is that I get to be part of somebody else’s success, and then celebrate together and congratulate each other when we you know, do things that we’ve been trying to achieve and things like that. So research has shown that the most successful people in the world do not do it alone. So if you’re multitasking, come back to me. You cannot do it alone. You might try but you will be so much more successful if you have a community of women around You who are going to be your biggest cheerleaders to show you the way. So all of this got me thinking, and I’ve created something really special to support you, which I will share at the end. But for now, I’m gonna give you three easy ways that you can form powerful friendships with ambitious women in leadership just like you. So are you ready? Okay, so before we kind of dive into that, I want you just to reflect on a couple of things. Number one, can you see how important it is to have friends just like you? Can you see the benefits to you if you had a community or a soundboard or a system around you, when the when the shit hits the fan. It’s so so important. You just don’t have to do this alone. So I want you to just bear that in mind, as I give you these three examples. Now, it may involve pushing yourself out of your comfort zone. But like I always tell you, you only grow when you leave your comfort zone. Okay?

Okay, so the first thing you can do if you want to have more female friends who are allies, like you so that you’re more successful in your career and in your life, is to join a women’s group in your own site or in your own areas of business. So most companies actually have the setup. And in fact, I’m actually working with a couple of companies this year on optimizing and setting up their women’s groups so that they’re better. And these are fabulous ways to begin to connect with other women in within your business. Now, they do tend to be purely educational kind of forums. And I know that some people don’t feel very comfortable, really sharing certain failures and things around their colleagues. But it’s definitely a great option to start off with, like, there’s so much

money and finance tell is being put into these women’s groups at the moment in the corporate world. So I know sometimes you might see those Women’s Network or women’s group meetings coming up on your calendar. And you might say, Oh, I couldn’t be bothered doing that today, because I have all this work to do. But actually just think about when you do attend those forums. And when you do actually engage, I know that it benefits you and you know that it benefits you when you engage. And that is the key. But again, like I said, I know sometimes it might feel a bit awkward, or you may not want to really share what’s going on. But that’s definitely something you can do you you already have a community of women where you work that you can start to make more friends with.

The second thing that you can do is you could reach out to specific women that you work with. And literally ask them to your friends be their allies, pick a few women, who you really admire and just ask them to form some sort of a little group with you. So what you would do is, say, for example, you want to be more confident, or you want to be a better leader, or you want to be more articulate, or you want to be able to communicate really effectively. When you’re asking questions in a meeting, for example, I want you to think about the areas that you struggle with, and that you see a lot of colleagues or women struggle with, and seek out people in your organization who are like who are really good in those areas. And the thing is, is that you need to make sure that obviously you’re bringing something to the group, it’s not all about you learning from others, you want to be able to share your your knowledge and learnings too. So I would say think about you know, a few women who you could get together in a group now, you would need to obviously agree the rules for the group and decide how often you’re going to meet up, you’d need to commit to actually doing this because it’s only going to work if you’re all kind of committed to do together and agree how you will actually support one another. Okay, so that the first two things you can do the first one is join a women’s group that already exists in a in your site or in your area of business. And the second thing you can do is reach out to women that you admire and ask them to basically be your allies and come up with some sort of a structured way of meeting.

And then the third thing that you can do, which is what I am so excited about is you can join a leadership mastermind. So if you’re not really feeling comfortable speaking, open work and there’s certain conversations that you just can’t have at work or you don’t really want to get into organizing events and more meetings at work and having that responsibility. Joining a leadership mastermind is the perfect solution for you. Because this will kind of take the organization and planning away from you and help you to connect with like minded women. So first thing what is a mastermind? So if you haven’t heard from that before of that before, which I know a lot of people haven’t because I’ve actually done polls on this on my Instagram recently. So I read The book, it’s called Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill. And he kept coined this idea of a mastermind in his book back in the 1920s. So in this book, which is I would highly recommend it, it’s not necessarily about money, it’s it can be, but it’s more about how to be successful. So in his book, he studied the habits of successful businessmen like Thomas Edison, Carnegie, Henry Ford, I think there was like 200, there was a cop, few women in there too, but it was largely men back in the 19. Honda in the 20th century, is that what you say? 1920 something. And he realized that he had, I suppose the key to success of these these businessmen, business women, is that they had formed partnerships and groups to come together and to learn, which was the key to one of their success. So the mastermind, I think, he says in the book is, it’s the formation of a third mind that wouldn’t exist if the other two minds didn’t come together. So if you’re multitasking, come back to me.

So a mastermind is the formation of a third mind that would not have existed if the other two or more minds hadn’t come together. So what that means is, is that when you’re thinking, in your own mind about your own problems, and trying to come up with your own solutions, it’s about having that master mind. So that different perspective, those different experiences all flooding around as you’re having conversations, and what happens in that energy is that you you form solutions that you would never see if you weren’t basically in that space. So one of the key benefits of a mastermind is that it provides a space to basically problem solve and dig into challenges that you’re working through. It’s a safe space to ask tough questions to yourself and to others to really level up in your career to learn from others experiences. And usually, there’s trainings and education provided to in some mastermind, some, some they’re not. So you’re continuously learning and growing as well. Like, even there’s masterminds out there. So parents can learn how to be better parents and managers who want to elevate their leadership skills can come together with people in similar career trajectories. And some companies offer masterminds as part of their training programs for early managers, but they don’t tend to have them as you climb the ladder, as apparently, you’re the experts, right? But come on, even experts need support and relationship and friendship and guidance, right, we can’t do it alone. But what’s really important if you are joining a mastermind group is that you have a shared vision, or a common ground with the other members. So there’s no point in obviously joining a mastermind, if it is a mastermind, for I don’t know how to be a pig farmer, if you’re not interested in that it obviously needs to align to your goals. So some of the benefits that a mastermind can provide our accountability, which is a massive thing. So sometimes we know what we need to do, what actually because we don’t have someone there to hold us accountable. Our inner critic gets in the way, we procrastinate, and we don’t do anything. And then we’re in the same space as we were six months ago. It’s regular connections. So it’s actually knowing that you have connection calls and that you’re going to be supported. It’s networking, it’s really a trusted circle of like minded peers and colleagues, to help you to problem solve and to learn and to make decisions. And it’s a really good chance to learn from other businesses and other leaders. So like I said, I have learned so much from my my clients, even just from the one to one work that I do, and from working in companies as well, seeing how different companies do things, seeing how the tools they use to problem solve, and how they handle performance issues, and the structures and the templates and all those things. It’s amazing. What if you’re just siloed thinking about your own business and your way of working in your industry, you’re missing out on so much gold. So it’s a really, I suppose it’s an opportunity for you to obviously learn. But it’s also an opportunity for you to share and advise others and celebrate each other’s wins. And it can be I suppose, lifelong friendships with women who really get you so even the mastermind I’m in right now, I know I’ve already formed friends that just get me who understand the challenges I’m going through. And it’s, it’s really nice just to have that community of women around you who want the same things as you because I think you know, we all have friends. We all have family, but there’s very few women that I speak to who are ambitious and driven like we are, who have that tribe, our community of women who are powerhouses just like them. So I believe that, from my experience, having people to call on when You need it is one of the safest investments you can make. It really, really is. So if you’re listening to this live right now, which is going to be January or early February 2023, I am so excited to announce that I have just launched a mastermind group for women in senior leadership roles. And it’s called, drumroll please a powerhouse the mastermind. So you can read all about it in the show notes at offers dot Lucy garden.com, forward slash mastermind. And I’ll link it in the show notes as well. So first thing, why did I form this? Why did I decide to form a mastermind? Like I said a minute ago, you probably have a lot of friends, but no one that’s really in a similar position and really understands the problems that you face, you might feel isolated at your level. And you might find it hard to find other women in your organization who are navigating the same things.

Maybe in a male dominated environment. I know that sometimes you might feel lonely, like a lonely, ambitious woman in leadership and an island all by yourself, you might lack the sense of community that you don’t gain at work or in your existing network of friends. And I know that you want to be around like minded women who are passionate, ambitious, driven, and fueled by growth and development who just get it. So if you’re a warm, ambitious woman who wants to stand out as a great leader, and progress in your career without compromise, so without compromising your family, how their happiness, my community is going to be the community for you. So what will you do so you will connect with a community of ambitious women leaders just like you, you will learn new skills and tools and approaches to help you stand out as a great leader. So there’s going to be a strong focus on learning and development in this as well as connection, you will actually have time carved out for your continuous professional development, which you know, you neglect anyway, you’ll be able to have open authentic conversations that you can’t have at work, you’ll be able to navigate work challenges and less stress but more ease, you’ll be able to progress your career without compromise. And you’ll have that personal board of advisors to help you to navigate challenges. So I know you have overcome so many barriers and challenges to reach the level of seniority you’re at right now. And now that you’re there, it can be lonely. And your friends and your family don’t fully understand how you feel when you have to hop on a flight to solve a crisis or if someone is sick, and you have to pick up the pieces. But this women, the women in this group will, you will have a safe space to gain support to congratulate each other and progress to the next level together. You’ll also have time allocated in your calendar to focus on your CPD, which like we said, you know, you neglect Okay, all this comes last. So I don’t want you to feel alone in the world of leadership anymore or lie awake Finstock, the powerhouse mastermind will be there to support you every step of the way. And you’d only be a message away from a group of like minded supportive women to encourage uplift and inspire you. So if that sounds like something if you’re like, oh my god, Lucy, I need to get into this group. I would like to extend the invitation to you to join my mastermind group. So it is for women in senior leadership roles. So if you want to learn more about what that means and you’d like to apply for the mastermind, you can DM me the word mastermind on Instagram or on LinkedIn. Or you can send me an email with the word mastermind and I can explain a little bit more. So again, if you go to the show notes, you’ll be able to read all about it. It’s offers dot Lucy garden.com forward slash mastermind, that’s offers dot Luci garden.com forward slash mastermind. So just to recap on the three ways that you can have more female friends and allies in your life this year in 2023. Number one, you can join a women’s group that already exists in your own site or your own area of business. Number two, you can form your own group and reach out to women you work with and ask them to be your allies. Or number three, you can join a leadership mastermind of like minded women and I would love Love, love, love, love. If you were a warm, driven women in a senior leadership role who wants what I’m offering, I would absolutely love to have you on board. So please, please click Apply. And we can have a conversation all about it.

So that is it. For this week’s episode. I wish you so much genuinely success, happiness and balance this year. I want you to have more friends. If you’ve been focusing on work, I want you to experience the beauty of friendships and doing things together and taking things off your bucket list apart from work, and I really hope that 2023 Is that year for you because you have worked so so hard for too too long, and it is time to put yourself first. So until next time, take care and I’ll talk to you then. Bye for now.